Maybe because it is dreary and rainy out. Or maybe it's because T has been sick this week and it has just been so draining dealing with all the whininess or clinginess. Or maybe it's because Tyler has taken off on one of his fishing trips, and I hate it when he's gone. I'm just feeling so uninspired when it comes to thinking of something to post about.
But it's not all bad. There is some good. I guess I'll talk a bit about both.
So, crappy stuff from this week. First off, F's failed meds wean. I tried, it didn't seem like he was ready, so I put him back on. I was pretty disappointed, but seeing as how his mood and sleep improved pretty much immediately I'm fairly certain he needed the full dose back. He had his 1yr checkup this week though, and the doctor really wants to see us try to wean again soon. I agree, I do want to try, but it is just not that straightforward. I'll probably give it another shot in a few weeks.
I was also disappointed to learn he really has not gained any weight since his last checkup, 3mos ago, and really is a teeny little thing. I figured he was at least 20 lbs, but he's not, he is only 18 lbs 12oz. Not even 19 lbs! I think T was about 20 lbs at a year. I know he is fine, I know he is really active, and that he doesn't eat that much, and that with my genetics my children will never be huge. But it has made me want to focus more on his eating as it is just rubbish.
Then there has been T's mystery virus which has made for a very difficult week. On Tuesday afternoon he came down with a fever, and by dinner that night he was a wreck. I can't remember the last time I saw him like that. He managed to sleep it off, and while he was feverish on and off for a few days after it really didn't progress into anything. However as a result he has not been sleeping well, and he has been soooo whiny. Like whinier than he has ever been. And clingy. It has been hard to deal with. I know he isn't feeling well, but at the same time I just want my happy toddler back!
And finally, Tyler's fishing trip. I like that he has a hobby that he really enjoys, but I hate that it consumes him so much. I also hate his trips where he goes away for a few days. I don't really like it when he's gone, but it's not just the time he is gone. When he plans one of these trips, he spends so much time preparing, sorting his gear, shopping for stuff, making stuff, and packing it's ridiculous. It means that for a trip where he'll be gone 2 days, I actually lose his company for the better part of a week. It's depressing. It's made even worse when things are off with the kids (like T being sick) and I know I'm left to deal with it on my own.
I think that is the hardest part for me. My job does not end, it is almost 24/7. So as much as any working adult, I look forward to the weekends when he is home and I have a little help with the kids, and maybe get a little break. Particularly after a week like this, where the boys have both been hanging off me and whining in my ear, not to mention sleeping poorly which means I have not had much sleep myself. The weekends are a chance for me to hopefully get some help, and maybe a little rest. Well, not when he takes off. To me it feels never ending, last week bleeds into next week with no break in sight. Exhausting. I guess too that I'm a little resentful that he can just take a break from all the whining, and crying.
But that is enough with the miserable stuff, how about the happy stuff, eh?
Like, we had a really great play date this week! One mom friend I have made invited me and the boys over on Thursday morning and we had a really great time. The boys all seemed to play well together, and M and I had a chance to chat and get to know each other better. Their house is just lovely and they have the most amazing backyard. T got to jump on a trampoline for the first time which he really enjoyed. We took a stroll down to the stream and all the boys ended up stomping through the water, getting soaked. The older boys had to walk home with wet pants and shoes, but we stripped the younger ones down to diapers and shirts and walked back. It was loads of fun, and I am so happy that we seemed to have clicked with another family.
We had some beautiful, warm weather this week. The boys and I tried to get out a lot, and actually I got to chat with some other moms at the park that I've seen around the neighbourhood.
T is officially enrolled in Montessori for September, yay!
I made it out to zumba twice this week which is great. I always feel more human when I get to escape and exercise, even if it's just for 2 hours a week.
Today after swimming we went to the Teddy Bear Picnic at the YMCA. It was inside since it was raining, but was good fun nonetheless. There was a bouncy castle (T's favorite!), arts and crafts, balloon animals, and all sorts of other activities. T got to sit in a police car and push the siren button which he really liked, and he was so excited to see a real fire truck up close. He got to pet a snake as well. We had a really nice time.
So there you go, the bad with the good. Gotta look at both sides! Hopefully I will feel more inspired next week.